Flashback to a few weeks ago, I was asked to help ‘little girl’ review for her 3rd quarter exams. ‘Little girl’ had already failed the previous two quarters, with grades of 72 and 73, and needed to do really well in this exam to be given before the holiday break. So review we did with the very little time we had. ‘Little girl’ is very bright, who just needed a little bit of push, so I was confident that she would do fine. I left their house that Sunday afternoon with high hopes and my fingers crossed.
This afternoon, I received a text message from ‘little girl’s’ mom thanking me for the help I’ve given her. Turns out, ‘little girl’ had gotten an 84 for the third quarter. Definitely a huge leap from her 72 and 73.
The news made me smile, a genuine one — the first time in weeks.
I have been feeling kind of sullen the past couple of weeks. Nothing seems to cheer me up; Even the ones that usually do the trick can’t seem to work their magic. I have been feeling kind of lethargic and sad, unproductive, and feeling a bit inadequate like I’m not doing enough. Maybe this is midlife crisis? Nah, too early, too soon. I’m only in highschool anyway. Although there is no shame in feeling such, one should not dwell too much.
It’s funny how just when I was really being too hard on myself, yet again, for whatever reason or whosoever’s doing, I wake up and open my eyes — wide enough for me to see how foolish I have been. Through the kids I help study every weekend, their parents, and my family and friends, I was made to realize that I am not inadequate, and that I should not dwell too much on my sadness and hopelessness. I was made to realize that as little as it may be, I am of help to someone. I have a purpose.
It’s just like that most of the time, we need to be reminded of our value or worth as persons because unfortunately, we have a tendency to either forget or neglect, or someone fails to see our worth and makes us feel that way. And it shouldn’t be like that. Actually, we should not even rely on other people just to see our worth.
I have been schooled again. Another day, another lesson learned. Taking baby steps to become much wiser every day. Borrowing the words of Og Mandino from one of my favorite books, The Twelfth Angel, “Day by day, in every way, I’m getting better and better.”
Yes, I am.