For the past few days, my Ate neighbor has been playing Yeng Constantino’s “Chinito”, day in and day out, on full blast, for everyone’s entertainment. The same darn song greets me as I wake in the morning, welcomes me home in the late afternoon, and on a couple of nights, lullabies me to sleep. While I am not a very big fan of Ate neighbor’s loud music playing, it weirdly does not annoy me, and in fact, to some extent, I’ve grown to be amused by it.
Ate neighbor’s probably in love. The thought of someone who’s in love is enough to leave a fleeting smile on your face, too. Ate neighbor’s state of possibly being in love is quite contagious, and this is coming from someone who just recently declared she does not believe in #forever.
Funny how someone you haven’t met personally can have such an effect on you.
Then, there’s Other Ate.
Other Ate does not return my “good mornings”, nor does she smile back when I give my sweetest one. She has this pasted expression on her face that tells you something bad probably happened to her during her commute to work— eyebrows perched as one, wrinkled top of the nose, no eye contact, body language that shrieks, “Don’t talk to me!”, and an air of negativity around her. The ‘angry emoji’ sadly reminds me of her. Whatever Other Ate’s going through, it’s clearly reflected on her face and in her actions, hence, she drives people away.
I can relate to both Ate neighbor and Other Ate.
Like my Ate neighbor, I know how it is to be in love. I have told friends, again and again, how much I believe that falling in love is one of the best feelings in the world despite not believing in #forever. More than the feeling of being in love, though, I think what’s even more beautiful is how you infect other people with your positivity. It shows in what you say, what you do, what kind of decisions you make, what songs you listen to, basically, how you approach life and its obstacles — and it’s contagious.
But I also used to be like Other Ate — negative, bad vibes abound. And like other Ate, all the negativity was never really caused by any huge problem or issue. Okay, failed relationships could have caused it, but more than that I think, is just me dwelling on the negative more than all the positive things happening in my life. I can’t find the answers why I chose to do that, but I did realize I didn’t have to, so I stopped and turned things around.
It is oftentimes difficult to psych yourself into focusing all your energy on good things especially when things aren’t always as rosy. What helps me cope though is to accept that things won’t always go my way, and that it’s fine even if they don’t. I continue to learn to pick myself up when I fall. I have begun to laugh off and learn from my mistakes. I surround myself with people who are supportive and understanding, and in turn, I try my best to understand and be compassionate of people who might be going through something I know nothing of.
And sometimes, all it takes is to encounter that one person, a stranger or not, who will turn your perspective around for you; that one person, who may be unmindfully and unintentionally, infects you with her/his own happiness…just like how Ate neighbor has infected me with hers.
We all have a bit of Ate neighbor and Other Ate in us. Most often though and unfortunately, we touch base with the latter more than the former. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but just don’t stay there too long. Keep choosing the positive; keep looking at the brighter side of things; And without you even realizing it, you’ve already bid the Other Ate in you good bye, and you’re already an Ate neighbor to someone who badly needs her.
Join me in my LSS, will you? 🙂